I knew this not talking business would be a challenge.
It is a huge challenge.
On Day Two, it got downright serious.
Julie had planned to take the day off, just in case I needed her, so she was home all day. Thankfully, physically, I was doing well and didn’t need her for that purpose. The pain in my throat was greatly reduced. If I had permission to go jogging, I could have done so. I made supper—a simple go-to: fried ground beef with corn and mashed potatoes. Mix them together and you have a reliably tasty meal.
What I found yesterday was that I simply wanted to be alone. Why? Because communicating without talking is laborious.
I had installed an app on my phone which speaks the text. It doesn’t work as smoothly as my regular texting app, and the voice speaks very mechanically. Almost always, I had to have it speak a second time so it could be understood. I quickly tired of that and abandoned it.
Mostly, I hand write in a pad. I have to write slowly so that my penmanship is legible. I can type out texts just as quickly, and I’ve done quite a bit of that, but it seems more impersonal to do that with Julie sitting right across from me.
What are humans prone to do when faced with a hiccup, a hurdle, a hitch in the system? Rather than do the work to conquer the problem, we often ditch it. We run from it. We remove it from our life.
It’s way easier to do so. It’s not the smart move, but it is the regular move.
Hence, my desire to be alone.
It is a desire I am going to have to fight with for ten more days because I don’t want to be separated from Julie any more than I already am because I cannot speak.
Two days in.
Two lessons learned.
Ten days to go.